On The Road Again...

I have successfully avoided out of state travel without Roo for a few months now, but the travel game is back on. Chicago a couple of weeks ago. NW Arkansas this week, Neenah, WI next week. Some days it is easier to leave my little girl behind, others not so much. She is growing like a week and every day is an adventure. This morning I wanted to snatch her up and bring her with me (and ask Kerry, I was seriously contemplating it), but let her sleep. My team in Arkansas has gotten to know her over the last two years and just like they consider me family, they also consider Roo family so they love to see her whenever they can. She has made it down here twice and I need to sneak her down again before she turns 2 and I have to buy her a seat. Next time.

Hopefully all will go well with my flights and I will be home late on Thursday so I can give Roo a big hug when she wakes up in the morning. Just in time to see her do "jumpy jumpies."

Chatty Cathy

Or chatty Reagan in this case. Wow, is our kid talking up a storm! She is trying her best to speak entire sentences, but can usually only string 1-2 words together. But we can understand her more than ever, and she never stops talking...or giggling.

Tonight we were in the bathtub I asked "how was your day?" - much like I do every night. And just like she does every other night she starts naming all of her friends and teachers from "school". Then we talk about playing "owside" and art projects like "cowor" (as in outside and color for those of you who don't speak toddler). She also made a request for 'kayons" (bathtub crayons), but since the cleaning lady was just here she was promptly denied ("mommy lost the crayons honey, I'll look for them tomorrow").

Every night we also sing a song (or 2, or 3). Big faves include "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" , "If You're Happy and You Know It" and "A, B, C, D". Tonight was a big alphabet night, but Roo was adamantly independent, unlike other nights, requesting that I not accompany her. In fact her exact words were "No Mommy, No. I wan sing mself." Pretty impressive communication for a 22 month old. And no I am not spelling incorrectly, just trying to quote my kid. It was cute though, every time I would try to interrupt her she'd say the same thing, "no mommy, no. I wan sing mself." And she pretty much did the whole song. She knows many of the letters and for the ones she doesn't she just tries to say it and kinds makes a phonetic mumble.

I am sure it won't be long before she knows all the words, and as much as I love to hear her sing-songy voice, I am sure eventually the repetitive nature of the songs will drive me crazy. For now, I am just happy to enjoy them.

Poop Issues

It is official, my kid is afraid of poop.

The other day I was giving her a bath. I asked her to stand up so I could properly get her backside. She looked at me and said "I poot". Keep in mind she says this all the time, with no clear deliverable, so I ignored the warning. Then my dear girl proceeded to poop in the tub. I though we were through this stage, but apparently not. Before us floated three decently sized poop balls (sorry, not sure what else to call them).

Now what was I supposed to do? If I let her get out of the tub, it was sure to end in a wet running toddler, who would eventually slip and fall. Too much chaos for me.

I called for Kerry and as Reagan looked down and saw the "poots" floating towards her, she panicked. I mean full-on, toddler screeching panic. You would've thought they were going to bite her. I laughed at first and then realized I had a poop dirty child clinging to me and we needed to get this taken care of and get us back on track to storytime. Fast.

We did the usual. Drained the tub (while one of us occupied our energetic child), cleaned the tub, refilled the tub, plopped our child back in and resumed bath time. What a hassle.

Moral of the story, listen to my kid if she says ANYTHING remotely sounding like "poot".

Obviously Not Hard Enough

OK, OK, I said I was working on it. This blogging stuff is a lot of work.

Roo has been a blast this Summer and she is really getting the whole talking thing. One of the things that amazes me the most is how she seems to automatically properly conjugate a verb. Have no idea how or why it happens. The other day as we were getting ready for bed, Reagan decided to place a book on her rug and then lay on it, belly down. Kerry asked her if she was surfing and she looked at him and said "I surf". How did she know that she shouldn't say "I surfing"? Crazy.

Roo has also become slightly obsessed with Auntie Court. She goes through her phases though. We had to go to DC for a family funeral (my Godfather) and Court met us down there. We have been trying to get her to say Courtney's name for a while now and it always came out "Corey" or "Corky". Well, she finally got it. Once she figured out she was saying it right she wouldn't stop. Every time she saw her Auntie she would yell "COURT" at the top of her lungs. On the drive back to CT, we followed Court for a little while, then lost her. Then we caught up again, as we drove past her, I said "look, there's Auntie Court.", Reagan began yelling "COURT" at the top of her lungs and looking out the window, well past the point where we actually passed Auntie Court. Have to say it was sweet that she was so excited, but slightly annoying for the rest of us as fellow passengers.

Guess that is all for now. I again sign of, pledging to be better about this, but we shall see.

Working On It

OK, I admit it. I am a bad Mom. Well, actually I think I am a fairly good Mom with an overfull schedule and too many commitments, which then makes me feel like a bad Mom. Which brings me to the fact that I have not updated this blog in over a month. Bad Mom.

So much has happened, I don't know where to start. It has gotten so bad that I keep notes on my iPhone so that I don't forget topics to post. It is so frustrating that I started this damn thing and promised myself that I would do the due diligence of updating it in an effort to be a detailed baby book and here I am. Behind. Dear Amy was right again. She warned me.

In addition to not updating this as often as I should, I have come to realize that many entries are about me. My life with Roo for sure, but focused on me. Not sure what I expected, that Roo would actually write the entries? Believe me, she has tried. She is a big fan of the computer, but truly not capable. Maybe I should change the address and name? I am a very uncreative person, so not sure what I'd call it. If anyone has any suggestions, let me know.

In the meantime, here are a few Roo topics I will get to eventually: Our Greek Festival adventures, family work trip to Arkansas, Roo's school schedule adjustment, our visit with the Hesbergs, trips back and forth to NJ to visit my sick Mother, Memorial Day visit from Auntie Court, "I sorry Reilly", first year's trip to the beach (and pool), Roo's favorite water spot and picking Mommy's "matos". Not in that exact order, but that is the beginning of my list.

I am sure no one reads this thing, but I will continue to pretend that they do and make yet another commitment to update more often. Bad Mommy or not.

Phone Chats

Since I do travel so much, I try to remember to call every morning and every evening to check in. I ask the standard set of questions, How did Roo sleep? How did she wake up? What did she have for breakfast? How was school? Did she do any art projects? What did she eat for dinner? Blah, blah, blah. I guess I think that by asking those questions, I am still somewhat involved in her day…from 1500 miles away.

Typically when I call Kerry puts the phone on speaker (we have been doing this for each other since she was an infant) and he proceeds to try to convince Roo to speak to me. He says “Roo guess who it is? It’s Mommy!” Most of the time she just wants to grab the phone and play with the buttons, which means ultimately she is just going to hang up on me.

Kerry makes is best effort to encourage Roo to be phone chatty and sometimes it actually works. At worst I get a “bye-bye” and at best I get a couple more words, an “I love you” and a “bye-bye”. If Kerry is in a tickling mood, I might even get a couple of giggles. To be honest I don’t care what she says as long as I get to hear her little voice at least once a day.

The thing I don’t understand is that when someone is not on the phone that is when she finds it the most attractive. She grabs it out of the charger, puts it up to her ear, rests it on her shoulder and has a full blown conversation. All to the standard recorded message “your call can not be completed as dialed. Please hang up and try your call again.” Because, of course, she has pressed the “on” button.

She also knows how to use the ringer. In fact she prefers to mess with the ringer, pretending that the phone has actually rung, before she begins her phone chat. This all usually happens when I have turned my back or have walked out of the room and I run scrambling to answer the phone only to realize that Roo has commandeered it for a little playtime. It is like a cruel joke that I should’ve learned the punchline for already, but she keeps doing it and I keep running for the phone.

Growing up we had a Mickey Mouse rotary phone in our family room. My Sister was apparently quite the household troublemaker and into everything. My Mother tells a story about how she caught My Sister in mid-phone call one afternoon. To Japan. To be honest I think it is a family urban legend, but I need to remember to check our phone bill. The one thing I have learned is that chances are that your toddler is smarter than you think they are, or at least smarter than you are ready for them to be.

Just When You Think You Can’t Feel Any Guiltier

The world of a working Mom is surrounded by guilt. No matter what you are doing or who you are with, you feel like you are gypping someone out of your time. Add in the fact that I am an overachieving control freak and I am basically screwed. Especially Monday through Friday. If I leave at 5 to spend time with Roo, I feel like I am not doing my job and by the time I get home I feel like I am rushing to put her to sleep so I can check my email. Add to that the fact that I have been on a plane almost every other week since January 1 and I just feel like a crappy Mom and a crappy employee.

After returning from the Bahamas it has been especially bad. This past weekend I had to miss out on my typical Roo time and head to NJ for a friend’s bridal shower. I really couldn’t take her with me so I left her at home with Dad and felt HORRIBLE. By the time I got home on Sunday she was 2 hours away from her bedtime and I had to be on a 6 AM flight to AR on Monday. I was so stressed about it, but Roo, as always, made me feel better.

Our typical bedtime routine is Mommy is in charge of bath time and bedtime prep. Daddy is in charge of reading and rocking. This night Kerry offered to let me hog the entire bedtime routine and read to Roo since I wouldn’t see her all week. I gladly accepted. Roo climbed into my lap with George (Curious George has become her cuddle buddy lately) and I began reading a Winnie the Pooh book. As I got to somewhere in the middle of the story, my sweet little girl looked up at me through her blonde bangs and reached up behind my neck with her free arm. She pulled me towards her, nuzzled into my neck, gave me a kiss and began patting me on the back in a comforting way. To me it was as if she was saying, “it’s OK Mommy, I still love you and I know you are doing the best you can”. I just started crying. It was quite possibly the best moment I have ever experienced. Of course, let’s be honest, she could’ve been thinking “please stop reading, you are boring me to death”. But I like my interpretation better. It helps me feel a little less guilty. Not much, but a little.

So as I sit in meetings, rushed to client dinners and tried to solve the world’s business problems, I try to remember that is it not quantity, it is quality that counts and that I need to treasure every moment I get to spend with my little girl. I need to slow down and enjoy those moments, even though the moment might a temper tantrum in the middle of Target that is so horrific I fear someone is about to call Child Protective Services and report me for torture. I take a deep breath, hug her and remind her how much I love her. That is what counts, that no matter what, she knows that I love her. More than anything.